Saturday, 11 February 2017

SISI SEWA:The Memoir of a Single Lady (Episode Three)

Continued from Episode Two

In my mind, I was cursing and calling her all sorts of terrible names that I dared not say aloud to her hearing, I wan die troway? The moment I heard the voice of my popman at the other end of the phone,I knew I was in a bigger trouble and I wished the ground would just open its mouth and swallow me alive.

It was when the witch of an auntie had recounted all to my father that her number six told her that she ought to have spoken to me about her discovery before calling my parents. And when she eventually did, I wished she never did because she was going from one Bible passage to another telling me it was wrong to have a boyfriend at my age. She even asked if I wanted to get pregnant and bring shame to the family. Who told her I was sleeping with Bobo Tee at that time? She went as far as telling me that she got married at the age of thirty-two as a virgin. Who cares? If you like,call yourself a virgin Mary. Did you actually think I was going to believe you? Those were the thoughts on my mind as she was running her mouth in the name of preaching the spirit of fornication out of my life .Yes! That was what she called my action and I couldn’t but smile to myself. All these spirikoko sisters sha.

I decided right there that I was going back to our house the following day despite being aware of what was awaiting me. But I would rather be in our house than being nagged to death with her persistent preaching. It was when her husband got back from the office that she stopped but not until he yelled at her sha o.

The issue was the welcome party I got immediately I got home and there was no point in lying as I was caught red-handed. My father wasn’t angry as I have envisaged. It was only my mum,typical of a Naija mum. My dad invited me into his study when he noticed my mum would never allow him talk to me in peace. She was already creating a show by shouting on top of her voice. Which name did she not call me?

            “Asewo,oniranu,. O fe lo gboyun abi? Ti e gba,emi ni maa fipa yoo sonu. Adojutini omo(Prostitute ,useless girl . You want to get pregnant? Please do,I would be the one to flush it out with kicks).”

When I got into his study,he was already seated and asked me to do same. I couldn’t for the fear that had welled up in me and was almost swallowing me. He had to leave his seat to drag me into one of the seats. He began to talk immediately I sat down. I was expecting him to tongue-lash me because he never used cane on us. To my surprise, he didn’t. Instead he said;

         “Adesewa,I quite understand what’s going on with you. As a matter of fact, I would be surprised if this isn’t happening considering your age and beauty.”
      “Daddy, you mean it is okay for me to have a boyfriend? I asked expecting him to say yes.
     “No and yes, he said. At this juncture, I became more confused but there was absolutely nothing I could do other than to listen to him.
  To be continued
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